Rejected, Raging and a Review

Feeling dejected now...I can’t go for Teach India this year (the first time I applied) because my final exams will be going on and I’ll have to miss two days of training. Vacation plans spoilt. No certificate, no teaching, just more wasted time. I do have my blog though, my only consolation...my shining beacon of hope in an otherwise bleak day. The first thing I do on my computer is check my statistics.Sigh... how easily satisfied I am these days. All it takes is a little statistic and my day is done. A large part of my happiness these days comes from my page views graph...the higher the graph, the wider my smile. Trivial, childish me.

I just noticed, I've kinda developed a double chin...a stupid bit of fat hanging behind my otherwise sharp chin...I hate it. I've declared a fast to thinness until it disappears. Exercising is so bloody painful. It works, yes. Fifty crunches and I have an almost flat tummy (until I eat again at least). I'm scared of eating and then puking...I’d like to do that but I've read enough about Anorexia and Bulimia not to try extreme stuff.

And then the computer...

Obnoxious little brother won’t get up...he’s developed a penchant for bribing.

“Want me to get up? Put my favourite music on” (which means I have to listen to Akon's sexual exploits until I'm ready to kill the guy) or

“Want me to get up? You lose your time”, bloody brothers, I hate him at times like these, sister dear is easier to handle...put on a movie and she’s happy.

Bro makes me grovel and beg...which hurts my ego like anything and not only that, he'll squeeze every last drop of begging out of you till you're ready to go bury yourself and then get up with a lot of grumbling and groaning while extracting promises from you to get up soon. Horridly exasperating.

I've almost killed him one or two times in the past for doing that (with equally horrid repercussions). I'm better at controlling my temper now...losing my temper has many downsides compared to controlling it. Controlling it makes the beast inside me cringe painfully for some minutes after I let go, making me cry sometimes, telling me I'm a sissy without a spine but losing it is worse, the physical pain, emotions running so high, broken furniture and bones and a dressing down from daddy.

Whereas after controlling my temper I can pat my back, reward myself and tell me what a good God's child I've become.

So, I'm not a very happy girl now. And reading Black Swan Green isn't making me feel any better...for lack of stuff to say here’s a review of what I've read until now.

I learnt about this book from Flavorwire’s Books To Replace Catcher in the Rye as the Perfect Teen Book, as Catcher has now become the cool book for cool high school teachers, not cool teenagers!

Anyway, the book is the story of Jason Taylor...stammerer (not stutterer, both are as different as diarrhoea and constipation!), teen (didn't catch how old, but old enough), poet and mid-range in school status hierarchy. There are many characters coming in throughout, Dean 'Moron' Moran - best friend, lowest level in school status hierarchy, Dawn Madden – boyish, inscrutable crush and a host of others, plus a four-member family: pa, ma, irritable elder sister and Jason.

It’s raw, honest and a reference dictionary for substitutes to f*** (which I think everyone really needs). The f-word is so overused...show some creativity people!

I felt it similar to The Casual Vacancy (Rowling’s latest (adult) novel) but not as boring (not at all. Whereas Vacancy should be read only if you really really want to know what are Rowling’s capabilities in adult fiction and you have two days to waste if you can finish it that fast).

So it’s a good read.

Ma has just put the radio on. Bheege hont tere is on, somebody please kill me...did someone hijack and obliterate Radio Mirchi's song database that the RJ didn't have anything else? Gawsh, I'm tuning out. Cya when I feel better. Bye.

  

P.S. My thoughts after re-reading this later: I sound like a total brother-hater. Do not misunderstand. I love the little angel (Though I would like to say varmint!)...It's just that he gets on my nerves sometimes.

And that sounded totally Hollywood. Why did I publish it then??Two words...Bone Lazy and incessantly proud of anything I write, even if its crap (a. k. a. Writer’s Disorder!)